What if!

Till the time my soul gets freedom from my body; I will practice my religion, I will carry out the righteous deeds, I will adhere myself to the efforts of making others happy; reason being HIS fear in my heart,,,

But What if these things end up with nothing!!! What if my prayers do not assist me in any case..,, How will I get assured that my prayers are being acknowledged in front of HIM the almighty. Yes, I agree there will be a day when I will hear a voice from deep within comforting my soul against all the bizarre, chaos fuming inside me. 

The fulfillment of desires for this world is not what I want from HIM,, its something more than that; a relation, a physically powerful bond between me and HIM,, that nurtures me to know HIS aspirations.

 By the time I reach this stage there will be no more desires left inside, and I being HIS creature will abide by, without questioning. 

But again the thing that frightens me equivalently; What if my practices for others are meaningless from their perspective and finally get dejected by HIM?

Not knowing when I will get out of the whirlpool of puzzlement, uncertainty. When will I enter into a place which is my very own which is real,.

Till then its HIM giving me the strength to survive, hope to stay, with a trust someday I will hear HIM loud and clear speaking inside me ,, the waiting period still vague.. Since the answer lies no where.

kaneezali

Kaneez Ali

TRANSFORMATION

25 Jan 1985, my date of birth as conveyed by my mother.  Never knew how I really appeared, what were my activities that time,, all the facts keyed into my mind so that I may have a past when I m old.

This inattentive, negligent phase of life is the significant time to groom, things learned at this instance is collected ever after. Once an infant is through this time,, the transformation starts.

   Human’s memory is initialized when born and programmed till he is grown up,, the time he starts making decision is the life segment when he has the data inside the lookup table of his memory with that sometimes he compares or sometimes tries to make a new thing out of it,, lastly its just the manipulation of that information in his head.

Comparable to a larva, when it conceal itself in a cocoon, every day it enters a new process till the time it fully converts to a butterfly. For human I can identify two stages apparently life and death. Among these two we transform ourselves. After the end of my first phase the death will triumph over, and hoping that there will be no more transformations further.

My entrance into a new world is another hope for breathing at this moment.

A new world with new things,, old experience tending to be worthless,, it’s a whole new world out there.

But I hope there all the sufferings will be over, without any conversion, I will just flow,, on my own,, knowing finally my belonging..,, Expecting that the feeling of this rip heart bleeding from inside will finish off. Living with this wish,, knowing that the answer lies nowhere I m optimist the same will happen,,…